TOP TEN MLIAS

10. Today I checked my facebook before my boyfriends of 2 years got home. His status was " About to propose, wish me luck " I 'liked' his status. MLIA

9.Today I tried number 153 of 333 ways to be kicked out of Wal-Mart. It said to scream in pain until someone comes along and asks what's wrong then act as if nothing happened. I live where there are no wal-marts so I went to Woolworth's and tried it. As my head was in my hands and I was screaming someone came up behind me and said 'This isn't wal-mart.' Patted my shoulder and walked away. Touche. MLIA

8. Today, I bought a fancy new black SUV Hummer. When I went to pick up my son from school, I put on a black suit, dark shades, and my blue-tooth earpiece. I waltzed into his last period class 10 minutes before it was over, and announced "Agent 03, It's time to go" At which point he nodded and packed his belongings and ran out. The face on his teacher was priceless. I hope my boss understands why I had to miss work. MLIA.

7. Today, I saw a commercial for the Snuggie. I thought it was stupid idea but I couldn't change the channel because I was under a blanket and I didn't want my arms to get cold. MLIA

6.Tonight, I was listening to the radio on my way home. “Heartless” by Kanye West came on, a few seconds into the song, the DJ stopped it and said “just kidding!” and proceeded to play “You Belong with Me” by Taylor Swift. This made my whole day. MLIA

5. Today, I was sitting in my room and heard a little boy outside sneeze. I said bless you, and five seconds later, I heard a very hesitant...."God??." MLIA

4.Today, while eating M&M's I found a purple M&M in my bag. I'm onto you, red and blue. MLIA.

3.Today, my boyfriend an I broke up. Naturally I was blasting Taylor Swift with the windows down. As I pulled up to a red light, I noticed a guy in his 20's listening to Taylor Swift with his windows down too. He looked at me and simply asked "break up?" I nodded and he said me too. It made my day just a little better. MLIA

2.A while ago in my AP Chemistry class, this one annoying kid and my friend were having a weird argument about who was better. The annoying kid said, "Well, at least I have a girlfriend!" to which I responded, "Whatever. Your girlfriend has 67 protons." In response, the entire class, including the teacher, turned their heads to look at the periodic table on the wall. The element with 67 protons is holmium, with the chemical symbol "Ho." My teacher was the first to laugh. MLIA

1.Today, we got our math tests back after being graded. One of my answers I knew was wrong, so I had drawn a stick figure next to it with the caption "this is a ninja in disguise. He is here to guard my answer from the Red Pen.". Next to my answer my teacher wrote "you need a new ninja." He had graded my test in blue. MLIA.